Parenting

The home visit was anointed by God. He revealed relationship dynamics that shows me the cause and effect in the girl's life.

I think she struggles very hard to go to school, but is not able to break through. There is a stronghold in her life and in her previous generations. Unless the Lord shows mercy and delivers them, there is no breakthrough. And how can there be a breakthrough, unless someone prays for them. N how can someone prays for them, unless people sees and knows. (Maybe i can share about them and ask for prayers)

When a parent spares the rod, he spoils the child. When a parent uses the rod too harsh, it breaks the child. A rod in the hand of the parents is God given authority and responsibility. It needs to be used with LOVE and WISDOM.

Even when I see the impact on this girl's life, what can I do other than to pray. For unless the Lord builds the house, the worker labors in vain.

God, use me as an instrument to channel life in the lives of these young ones.

Work

Much needs to be done.. but much are left undone..

Many ideas on what can be done.. but there are not many support..

Needs ranging from helping needy families, educating their children, befriending the emotionally disturbed, reaching out to youths who fight and slash.. Where can we start from?

We are only testing grounds, but the ground is hard. When God talks about toiling the ground and that labor will be hard, is He talking about the ground of the social needs?

Farmers over the years learnt how to watch the weather, understand the soil, and experiment with the nature of the plants they are planting.. Eventually, we have grains and vegetables in plently (mainly just for my country?) But they did it!

William Wilberforce took 17 years to abolish the slave trade.. With silly mistakes, good friends, some deaths, renewed passion from his confidante (aka wife), and sheer DETERMINATION, he did it. (Although slavery took on new forms in today's world) But he did it!

How are we going to do it? Abundant, desperate needs.. What is God calling me to do? Where is God leading us to?

Unless God builds the house, the builder builds in vain.. Be our Foundation and Anchor my dear Lord.

How' Baby this week?- Week 18

I look like I got some extra flesh at my tummy, n just overweight.. hmmm.. not too flattery but still trying to look my best with some suitable clothes.

Pregnant is an expensive event. New clothes, shoes, underwears, nutritious food and more food n more picky about food, medical fees, supplements etc etc...

So baby this week is about 5 1/2 inches long (about the length of a bell pepper).

When i go for my ultrasound scan, Wow! He/she is so active! Kicking his/her legs so frequently (though I can feel none of it yet)

According to what I read, his/her blood vessels are visible through his/her thin skin, and his/her ears are now in their final position. The genitals are noticeable now, but it was not so clear during the scan. =)

We have the names ready and we are prepared for either gender =)

Paul is talking to Baby everyday, as for me starting to learn likewise. Sometimes I feel bad that I was busy the whole day and neglected Baby. So i learn to take little moments to be with Baby such as while I am in the bus/train, walking or showering.

Thank God that preparing for motherhood is a 10month process that we all get the time to adjust and adapt.

I am so thankful that God is perfect in His timing and wisdom to create everything perfect. Thank you dear God.

Delivery

Got this feeling that I am going to have a smooth delivery...

N i am positive (at the moment) that I will be able to cope with the pain without the epidural. Since all women in the past and current have went through the process without painkillers, so I think I can as well. Need to up my threshold of pain!

Not stress about the delivery (at the moment), though the sight of bloody placenta during the afterbirth does put me off.. yucks (but its supposed to be nutritious).. Can i sell it for money?

Anyway, smooth delivery and pain enduring birth!!

Thank God for the peace you place in me =)

Week 15

How's baby growing this week?

- Your growing baby now measures about 4 inches long, and weighs in at about 2 1/2 ounces (about the size of an apple).

- She's busy moving amniotic fluid through her nose and upper respiratory tract, which helps the primitive air sacs in her lungs begin to develop.

- Her legs are growing longer than her arms now, and she can move all of her joints and limbs.

- Although her eyelids are still fused shut, she can sense light. If you shine a flashlight at your tummy, for instance, she's likely to move away from the beam.

- There's not much for your baby to taste at this point, but she is forming taste buds. - Finally, if you have an ultrasound this week, you may be able to find out whether your baby's a boy or a girl!

How am I this week?

- Developing a bit of sore throat, probably from the vomiting I had, and the spicy stuff I like to eat.

- Running nose from hormonal changes and increased blood flow to my mucous membranes

- Slight headache because of this 2 conditions

- Tummy getting bigger and I cant fit into all my skirts and pants expect 1-2 of them.

- Lesser vomit incidents but still feel nausea when I get too hungry or the bus jerks badly. (Motion sickness to the extreme)

- Less sleepy, and definitely more energy. BUT, when I have running nose, my body's natural reaction is to rest. Runny nose makes me sleepy. So, I am now less sleepy from pregnancy but more sleepy from runny nose..

Jia you Jia you to me!

The day God intervened...

The question of ministry involvement have long been on my mind, but there has no easy answer to it.

Since my wedding, I have dropped in my commitment. Now after I discover my pregnancy, I totally MIA from ministry.

Although many times I wanted to make a decision to leave TNT and move on, I find that it is easier said than done.

I wanted to find a cell group, but there is no determination to do so. Thought I wanted to leave TNT and move on, but I cant bear to let go.

There is no doubt that I am still passionate about helping young people, that I can contribute in helping the young one, but I cant seem to find my fit. I cannot keep up with all the commitments and therefore how do I consider myself a laborer?

Was left feeling confused for a long time and cannot even think straight about the issue. Today the breakthrough came. I was just typing an email to a beloved mentor when God shed light into the whole matter. I was so sad by the challenges I faced I cried, but I was also so glad God spoke.

Now that the issue is clearer to me, I believe God will guide me in my decision-making.

Into Week 12..

How's baby growing?

The most dramatic development this week: reflexes.

- Your baby's fingers will soon begin to open and close,

- his toes will curl,

- his eye muscles will clench,

- and his mouth will make sucking movements.

- if you prod your abdomen, your baby will squirm in response, although you won't be able to feel it.

- His intestines, which have grown so fast that they protrude into the umbilical cord, will start to move into his abdominal cavity about now,

- and his kidneys will begin excreting urine into his bladder.

(If he/she excrete urine into his bladder, how does it get pass out from his/her body? Hmm, or does it get pass out through my body?)

- Meanwhile, nerve cells are multiplying rapidly,

- and in your baby's brain, synapses are forming furiously.

- His face looks unquestionably human: His eyes have moved from the sides to the front of his head, and his ears are right where they should be.

- your baby-to-be is just over 2 inches long (about the size of a lime) and weighs half an ounce.

How I feel right now?

Unquestionably feeling better as the nausea wave lessen in intensity. Still get breathlessness easily. A drop in stamina because I have not been able to jog for the longest time. Even though I am compensating it through walking, it seems that it does not improve stamina. A lower tolerance towards hot weather and gives me headache easily. Constantly hungry and so always eating.

But overall, I am getting better and more energetic. I can cope with sweeping and mopping half of the house at one go. Sleepiness is still part of the deal. I can sleep for the longest time, if not for the fact that I feel hungry, I would not have wake up. In sleepy moments at night, I feel the best because there is no nausea wave, no breathlessness, no hot weather.. Looking forward to the bed tonight..

When Children Are Torn Apart

I don't know how to respond to children who have their parents going through divorce.

The mix of emotions they go through cannot be overstated. Guilt that it is their fault their parents are seperating, fear that their parents will stop loving them, anxious over who their future will be with, will they be seperated from their siblings etc etc..

How do I tell a kid about divorce? No answer is enough for them.. I cant tell them that its a normal thing and everyone's gg through it.. bcos it not a normal thing. Its in fact a lonely journey that they have to learn to go through.. LONELY bcos their emotions are so unique to them alone.. So unique their siblings may experience otherwise..

It hurts so much to see the children suffering alone.

When you bring it to the court to decide on care and control rights, it make lives uncertain. Why cant daddy and mummy come to decision? Why shd the judge decide who I shd be staying with? HELPLESSNESS..

O God, every young life that goes through such pain hurts you deeply. But God, you will strengthen them.. You give them the resilience to go through the pain.. N with the comfort you have given to them, then will in turn comfort others. Pray that every little one will experience your love..

Pregnant- Week 9

Entering into Week 9, this is how he/she looks like.. =)

-Nearly an inch long — about the size of a grape — and weighs just a fraction of an ounce.

- Starting to look more and more human. Her essential body parts are accounted for, though they'll go through plenty of fine-tuning in the coming months.

- Other changes abound: Your baby's heart finishes dividing into four chambers,

- and the valves start to form

- as do her tiny teeth.

- The embryonic "tail" is completely gone.

- Your baby's organs, muscles, and nerves are kicking into gear.

- The external sex organs are there but won't be distinguishable as male or female for another few weeks. - Her eyes are fully formed, but her eyelids are fused shut and won't open until 27 weeks.

- She has tiny earlobes, and her mouth, nose, and nostrils are more distinct.

- The placenta is developed enough now to take over most of the critical job of producing hormones.

- Now that your baby's basic physiology is in place, she's poised for rapid weight gain.

So how am I entering into Week 9 of pregnancy? Honestly, I am looking forward into advancing into pregnancy.

I feel horrible 50% of the time while pregnant. Nauseous, sore throat from being puke-ish, backache, tiredness, breathless, poor appetite are what makes me feel horrible.

I dont just have morning sickness, but i have sickness before and after my meal times- when i get hungry or when i am full, i feel sick.

Past week, while travelling to work, I feel nauseous for the most part of the time. Have to stop along the side of the road, wait for the nauseous wave to get over only for it to come back again and got to stop again. My colleague said I shd take cab to work, but if i were to do that, i will spend a bomb to take cabs during peak hours and i most likely have to do that few times a week or daily.

Everyday I hope for this 1st trimester to b over. To a better 2nd trimester! 2nd trimester are known to be the best time of pregnancy.

God, pls sustain me. You know how horrible it is when I have to travel so far to work and I have to travel so much for work.

Pregnant- Week 6

7.39am on a Sat morning.

Have spent my time with God and ate some fruits.

Enjoying some refreshing piano music while collecting my experience for the past 4 days.

Today is the 5th day I learnt of my pregnancy.

Trying to write down my experience and make sense of them.

On days like this, when I have time to be quiet and ponder and pray about the pregnancy, to breathe slowly and to feel the life within me, it begin to make sense and real.

Most of the time when I am engaged at work or people, the pregnancy seems unreal. The time when I remember I am pregnant occurs during meal times when I find that my appetite is unlike the past. Cant swallow much and most food seems to have a bitter taste to me.

Changes occurring to me:

1. Always feeling bloated.

2. Cramps

3. Constipated (at times I am unsure if I am having cramps or just need the toilet)

4. Breast feeling swollen

5. Poor appetite

6. Bitter taste to most food

7. Need to eat more fruits bcos it is refreshing and it helps to alleviate the bitter taste in the tongue

8. Backache

9. Breathelessness

10. In wonder of God's creation of life

11. In amazement of God's gift of love

12. In appreciation of God's love through Paul

13. In gratitude toward God's continual protection.

14. In trying to settle in the motherhood mode!

Many more changes will continue to occur. So far so good! The coming 7.5months seems hopeful to me that my journey will be a interesting one.

O God, from the mouth of infants and child You ordain praise. I praise You this day, with the life You create within me giving You praise also.