Feelings

This is just a blog to express my feelings. Whatever I am feeling.. Feeling down. Maybe too many things are bothering my mind. Yet somehow there dont seem to have any way out of it.

People who are reading this, do not feel stress for me. I am still the LiJie whom you know. When you see me, I seem very ok. And that is because seeing my friends cheers me up. Not that I am wearing a mask. I am jus happy to be with my friends. There are some feelings and problems that cannot be adequately explained or sort out in the short run. So do just give me the space to be on my own.

I know that I am in God's good hand. I was telling Santilin today that as long as she can come to a decision, she will be saving herself a lot of energy. Instead of having to be bothered about what to join and where to go each week, she can simply follow the decision that she had prayed and consider over. Maybe the same with me here. If I can make a decision and not be wishy-washy then perhaps my problem will be resolve. Jus that sometimes the process of coming to a decision is tough. I need to be v v careful in my thinking thru and praying thru. I need to weigh all the pros and cons and most imptly I need to hear from God.

Is there any wise counsel I can seek? Is there any one who can tell me if this burden would reduce over time? Is there anyone who can tell me if I can find the faith to continue believing in it? Will God give me the hope to persever. I am praying everyday for faith and hope. Perhaps I need to pray for a change of heart for myself.

God take care of me as I take care of others. Take care of my girls as I work with you to take care of them. I want to spend more time this year in praying more for them, thinking more about them, and finally to hear from God what He is doing in their lives. I desire to come alongside with God, partner with Him and contribute meaningfully in their lives. Sometimes I wonder if what I am doing is making a difference to them. No one knows but God. Pray that whatever I have input in their lives will be sealed by God and transform their lives.

God lift my burden and bring miracle into my situation. Thank you God for your faithfulness even when I am unfaithful. Even when I am underserving of your faithfulness